Sibling Relationships

(me & my siblings)

Even at 2 years old, I can see different relationships developing between the girls. It is interesting to watch and makes me wonder how they will continue to develop and change over time. It is such a unique experience to be a triplet. I can’t imagine what it will be like to always have a sibling at the same stage that you are at. My experience growing up as the youngest of three children doesn’t really seem to give me much insight into what the girls’ future holds. Will three be a crowd? Will two gang up on the third? (That happened quite often in my family.) Will two be closer to each other leaving one sister out? (I hope not! I seem to always want fairness and justice; it’s the social worker in me…lol.) What will their personalities look like over time? In what ways will they be similar to each other and different?

I am very different from my brother and sister. However, growing up, I always wanted to be like my brother and liked by my brother. I always thought everything he was doing was so cool and had crushes on all of his friends. I didn’t appreciate my sister until I was in college. With her being 5 years older than me, I didn’t feel like I could relate to her. In my mind, she was incredibly smart and musically gifted – exactly what every parent would want. I thought the bar had been set too high by my sister so I decided to rebel instead. She knew from a young age that she wanted to become a teacher and she did.

My brother was also incredibly smart and gifted in a technical, fix cars kind of way. His room was full of electronic toys and devices that were taken apart to determine how they worked. Some devices were used for parts in creating new gadgets. He is one of the most brilliant people I know. He has a talent for figuring things out, which is fitting that he is an engineer. That career path is not at all surprising considering his interests as a child.

As I grew up, my career goals changed quite frequently. I loved pretending to be a teacher, hair stylist, or mom. As a teenager, I decided I would become a nurse. I actually stuck to that plan until my first biology course at college. What was I thinking? I have an incredibly weak stomach for bodily fluids. Anyway, all of my career aspirations seem to encompass the role of a mother. Despite not liking bodily fluids, I find myself in the role of “nurse” to my children, along with teacher and hair stylist :)

Growing up, I was terribly insecure. School was a struggle for me as I hated feeling different from others because I am a Christian. I dreamed about having a twin sister. I LOVED the twin sisters in “Sweet Valley High” and so wished I was one of them. They were beautiful, popular AND each had a Jeep – how much better can life be as a teenager? I always thought that I would feel more confident if I had a twin sister going through life beside me. Now having triplets, I wonder if that is how the girls will feel or if they will develop their own insecurities as every teenager does. Will they get sick of being identified by their being “one of the triplets.” They will probably long to be a singleton because we always want what we don’t have, right?

I wonder too if I am seeing snippets of what their chosen careers will be some day. Because Keegan LOVES to read books, learn things, and be an assistant in helping others, does that mean she will be a Physician/Missionary? Does Samantha have a future as an Academy Award winner because of how dramatic she can be? Is Maggie destined for the Olympics because of her love for anything sports related? Okay so those are bit drastic but still it makes me wonder.

The challenge for me is to keep my opinions of what they should do or be to myself and let them develop their own interests and passions. I don’t want to sit in the bleachers for an Olympian daughter. I don’t think my nerves could handle it. Nor do I love the thought of my daughter living in dangerous situations as she cares for other. And Hollywood, come on? But I will try to keep my opinions to myself and help foster their interests to the best of my ability. Even if that means watching sports I don’t understand or supporting them in activities like math club or chess club even though it might not interest me. So as the girls get older, remind me of this challenge if (or more likely when) you see me faltering.

The girls seem to truly love each other but they can also fight like crazy and take pleasure in upsetting one of their sisters. At times, I feel bad for them because of how they always have to share attention and toys and rarely get one on one time. But what is funny is that when we do have alone time, they are asking about their sisters the whole time. So together they can make each other crazy but ultimately they don’t like to be apart. I can only imagine that it will become even more pronounced over time.